Day 161.

It is finished! John 19:30  The debt is paid. Our sins washed away by His blood. “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends” John 15:13

I watched Tyler leave this earth and think so much about Mary watching Jesus die on the cross.  The pain is awful, it steals your breath.  Please understand I’m not comparing the death of Jesus and the death of Tyler. Just the shared pain of a mother’s heart in the death of their child.

Charles Spurgeon said, “Christian, meditate much on heaven, it will help thee to press on, and to forget the toil of the way. This vale of tears is but the pathway to the better country: this world of woe is but the stepping-stone to a world of bliss. And, after death, what cometh? What wonder-world will open upon our astonished sight?

I have thought of heaven over the years but not as deeply as I do now. Now, I want to know everything about where my son is and I want to know, even more deeply, about the One he is with. When Tyler went to heaven, Christmas was right around the corner and at first I dreaded it and then I was thankful. I now find myself thankful again, I am in the valley of this journey and here we are on Good Friday. The day that Jesus died for our sins. The reason that we have hope even in death.  A day that reminds us that hope exists even in suffering.

I’m in a support group for parents whose children ran to heaven by way of suicide and while I have not experienced this, many of the parents say that they have been told their children aren’t in heaven because their last act was a sin.  I’m thankful that people are not the judges for who gets to enter heaven.  The only sin that can keep you from heaven is the rejection of Jesus.  Jesus died for our sins, not one of us enters heaven sin free, NOT ONE!  I’m thankful for a loving and forgiving God.  This forgiveness is displayed in action during the last supper, when Judas ate too! This forgiveness is displayed in action when Jesus says, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.” Luke 23:34 May we all remember why Jesus came, it is because we needed Him, we need Him still. We are all sinful, we have just categorized sin and most of us think that little sins don’t matter. But God doesn’t do that, your sin is sin.  May we not allow our own opinions to create separation from the word of God.  May we strive to love like Jesus.  I know where my son is, and I long for the day we are together again.

Friday is good because Sunday is coming! The victory is won!

“for he was teaching his disciples, saying to them, “The Son of Man is going to be delivered into the hands of men, and they will kill him. And when he is killed, after three days he will rise.” Mark 9:31