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All My Stories
Words from my heart
Day 320.
Some days I have to remind myself to breathe. My breath will catch when the wave of grief comes crashing in. When the reality that my son...
Sep 30, 20253 min read
Day 314.
Where is God in suicide? God’s sovereignty and free will is something I have been wrestling with over the last 10 months. This is not a...
Sep 30, 20254 min read
Day 306.
Happy Birthday to my first born. You would have turned 23 today but your days were numbered at 22 years and 59 days. This birthday...
Sep 30, 20251 min read
Day 304.
God is good. We hear that often and it is true. It is usually followed by, all the time. And that is true. But when do we usually hear...
Sep 30, 20252 min read
Day 297.
A mother’s cautionary tale. September is suicide awareness and prevention month. September 10th, is world suicide prevention day. It is...
Sep 30, 20255 min read
Day 291.
Well meaning comments. So many over the last nine and a half months but boy they cut deep sometimes. I’ve never been an overly sensitive...
Sep 30, 20254 min read
Day 283.
Tyler’s heart. When you find out that you are pregnant one of the first things they do after the initial blood work to confirm your...
Sep 30, 20253 min read
Day 266.
Fighting to live in the wreckage of suicide. Suicide is defined as the act of deliberately killing oneself. That is the definition of...
Sep 30, 20254 min read
Day 259.
When our children go out into the world wouldn’t it be great if they wore a t-shirt that boldly declares, “I love Jesus and I want you to...
Sep 30, 20253 min read
Day 242.
Eight months. How is that possible? Time is such a strange thing in grief. It is almost as if it gives you a glimpse of what it says in 2...
Sep 30, 20253 min read
Day 212.
Seven months. The ugly part of grief. When the road leads to anger. I’m angry that Tyler ran to heaven. I’m angry that God allowed it to...
Sep 30, 20253 min read
Day 181.
The delicate dance between joy and sorrow. Today is Tessie’s birthday and six months since Tyler went to heaven. Joy and sorrow. She...
Sep 30, 20254 min read
Day 161.
It is finished! John 19:30 The debt is paid. Our sins washed away by His blood. “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay...
Sep 30, 20252 min read
Day 151.
I’m not sure how it’s possible that it has been five months. Time is moving forward but it mostly feels like it is always November 8,...
Sep 30, 20252 min read
Day 120.
It has been four months today. It feels like yesterday and a lifetime ago. During the last little bit of time my flesh has been...
Sep 30, 20253 min read
Day 103.
Learning self control in grief. At our church we do a women’s coffee every three months. During this time the women who have lived long...
Sep 30, 20253 min read
Day 92.
Three months. That is how long it has been since I held my son’s hand as he went from this earth to heaven. Three months since I kissed...
Sep 30, 20252 min read
Day 83.
Today is my birthday. For the last few years Tyler has been the first person to say happy birthday. This was thanks to the Army and it...
Sep 30, 20252 min read
Day 75.
I read something this week in a book, How to Carry What Can’t be fixed, that a friend gave me. It said, “There’s a journey she must go...
Sep 30, 20253 min read
Day 68.
Bear with me it was an emotional week. This past week we started to go through some of Tyler’s accounts. It broke my heart in so many...
Sep 30, 20253 min read
About
Hi, I'm Christin.
So good to have you here.
I am a child of God. Wife to Andrew. Mother to Tyler(who is in Heaven), Jacob, Tessie, and five babies who went from my womb to the arms of Jesus. I am a herder of goats, farmer of flowers and chaos coordinator for our little farm.
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