Day 304.

God is good. We hear that often and it is true.  It is usually followed by, all the time. And that is true. But when do we usually hear it? It is when something good happens. Someone was healed. God is good! A car accident that should have been so much worse but only left a scratch. God is good! You buy a new house. God is good!  A pregnancy announcement. God is good! A prayer that was answered with a yes. God is good!

What about when those things don’t happen? What happens when someone’s healing is Heaven? What happens when the car accident is bad? What happens when you don’t get the house? What about the couple desperate to announce a pregnancy? What happens when a prayer is answered with a no? Is God still good? The answer is yes. It is hard to see the goodness of God in suffering but that doesn’t make it any less true. From day one on this road, I have wanted to shout that God is still good so, I say, “God is good, even in this.” Even in the earthly death of my son, God is good! Knowing that God is good doesn’t make the pain any less but it does mean that as I walk this road, it is not alone. “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all.” Psalm 34:18-19

Today marks 10 months without our boy here. Hope continues to do the work of healing the shattered pieces of our hearts. I submit to the Lord, I surrender to His sovereignty, I (am working to) accept what He has allowed.  I long for the day I can see my boy again but until then I have purpose here. This isn’t good but God is, even in this!

“In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.” 1 Peter 1:6-7